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372 Lefthand Canyon Drive
Boulder, CO, 80302
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Heartseed Health in Boulder, CO is an acupuncture and counseling practice offering holistic and integrative care. We can support you with medicine grounded in spirit and rooted in science.

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Filtering by Tag: relationships

Denial and Dignity: How to Live with Both

Dr. Noah K. Goldstein, DACM L.Ac.

Last week I came across these words from a teacher of mine:

“All the good intentions in the world won’t make us capable of honesty.

Denial is a response to pain; it’s not a conscious choice to go into denial - it’s an expression of what we don’t let ourselves know.

We can’t make ourselves be aware.

We can work to help ourselves come home to our own body, to be capable of working with what comes up in us, as well as what might be coming up in others when they tell us what their experience has been.

This is the beginning of true ecology”

- Thea Elijah

It is such a gift when someone puts such profound insight into words so clear and concise.

What struck me here the most….

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tags anti-racist, conflict, emotions, inspiration, relationships, courage, vulnerability

Love is the Answer

Dr. Noah K. Goldstein, DACM L.Ac.

Really, Love is the answer.

When it comes to relationships,
Love is the foundation.

And while it may seem obvious, and it may be cliche,
If and when we're able to access and feel into the love, amidst the conflict, amidst the pain, amidst the discord and disconnect, then everything will be a lot more likely to turn out okay.

We ask you to take a moment right now, while you're staring at your phone or sitting in front of your computer,
and with whatever cynicism or self consciousness that's there,

Place your hand on your chest and feel your heart.
Bring into your mind something or someone or some place you love.
And maybe, feel a smile spread across your face or a softness settle into your body.

And for the rest of the day, whatever happens, you'll always have your hand and your chest with you.
You can't forget to bring them along.

And let this love which you're feeling right now,
Let it move you to stop and notice the flowers, the particular quality of light through the trees.

Explore all the ways you can express your love today, even if just for yourself.

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Rebirthing Masculinity

And, perhaps more relevant to our conversation today that I stand before you as a cis-gendered upper middle class white male of Jewish decent. That carries an array of impacts on my lived experience and therefor what I share and how I share and what we do here together. We’re exploring a topic that for many people is charged and involves hurt and pain as well as love and goodness. I stand here humbly and fully aware of my limitations (including how much time we have). And so I apologize in advance if anything I say is in any way hurtful or harmful and request that you reach out and connect and help me understand and grow if that happens.

And finally, I’d like to just say explicitly that masculinity and patriarchy (from where I stand) are two very different things, although entangled. My hope that as we rebirth masculinity we contribute the crumbling of the patriarchy… and in that note, let’s dive in.

Where does Resilience Come From?

At our most recent parent's night, Zephyr's teacher, an amazingly wise an experienced woman whose radiant smile reminds you that Love is abundant in the world, asked us how we think about Reslience and culitvating reslience in our children.

Many tears were shed over the course of the conversation; and tears, those salty extensions of our hearts, are often a sign that something good is happening. That strong medicine is movine through a room. The medicine of connection and caring in this case.

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The Eagerness of Spring

I hope you're enjoying the way the spring is beckoning growth... with warm sun and cold wet rain and snow. There's a lot of change happening out there. It can be hard to digest it all.

I've been trying to find the moments where I can pause and slow things down to make it all feel more manageable.

I've been sitting with questions around urgency and rushing and business. I'm noticing how the buzzy anxiety that arises in my system when I run "the list" through my head actually freezes me up and slows me down…

Shining Light into Shadows: How to Resolve a Trigger
Shining Light into Shadows: How to Resolve a Trigger

It's been a while since I've been able to make the time to write. I'm feeling compelled now because something exciting is happening. I've been working a lot with people around triggers and it's been awesome to see the relief and change that's happening.

Okay, wait, what do I mean when I say "trigger?" Yes, I'm talking about those moments where we have a strong emotional reaction to something. But it's bigger than that.

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The Power of Discovering Intentions...

"I can't believe I did that again!"

"I'm not good at this"

"I don't deserve this this"

Whether it's through voices in our heads, emotions, or feelings in our bodies, we all experience "negativity." Self criticism, anxiety, depression, rage, anger, grumpiness, blah's are an inherent part of the human experience.

In fact, as I'm writing this, my internal cynic editor is annoyed by the triteness of that last sentence.

But we're going somewhere important, so I won't let myself get too caught up in that.

Behind all of the negativity is a positive intent.

When Our Minds Move...
When Our Minds Move...

Boxes and Boxes. Stacked here and there. Packing paper strewn all over the place.

An ongoing echo, "Where should I put this?"

Moving is a huge undertaking.

Sorting. Cleaning. Junking. Saving. Grieving. Releasing. Crying. Organizing. Cursing. Laughing. Remembering. Grieving some more. Fighting. Repairing. Doubting. Celebrating. Grieving. Crying. Giving stuff away. Buying new stuff. Feeling Confused. Feeling happy. Feeling Sad. Feeling Hungry. Not Feeling Hungry. Sorting more. Moving things around. Looking at the room and moving things around again.

"Where do I put this?"

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The Ripple Effects of Healing

It’s probably no surprise that I went through a rebellious hippy counterculture phase in college (I might still be in that phase on some level). During that time I was seeking soulful culture.

When I say soulful culture I mean a culture that recognizes the innate and priceless value of all things and has reverence for the world.

It was clear this was not to be found in the confines of modern western culture; a culture known for commodification and quanitification.

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Healing Intergenerational Patterns While Putting the Kids to Sleep

It's the last night of our trip to Charleston to visit my brother and his family and Zephyr (5 years old) is not cooperating with bedtime. I'm tired and ready to be done parenting and finish packing for our early morning flight.

Zephyr is practically bouncing off the walls.

I notice my nervous system getting more and more charged and can tell I will eventually snap and loose my temper.

"Zephyr, I'm feeling myself getting upset and am worried I might loose my temper if you don't cooperate with bedtime."

In the moment I feel proud about my communication, but later I realize this is kinda a sneaky backhanded threat. I'm essentially saying, "If you don't behave, I'll yell at you." Not exactly my best parenting move, but not my worst either.

Is Acupuncture Psychedelic Medicine?
Is Acupuncture Psychedelic Medicine?

I did mushrooms for the first time over winter break during my Freshman year of college. It wasn’t spontaneous. I was the kind of kid who was curious, but also cautious. I did copious amounts of research and thanks to a few friends and Andrew Weil, a progressive doctor who's written books on the topic, I decided to take the leap.

I did so in a pretty thought out way. I was aware of the importance of set and setting and had an experienced friend facilitate the day for me. It was magical and beautiful and wonderful. And it opened my mind in a particular new way….

A Response to the Wildfires in Boulder, CO
A Response to the Wildfires in Boulder, CO

Last week while driving Hazel home from school I was startled to see a plume of smoke rising up from what looked like our backyard. I called 911 to report it, they were aware. As I got closer to home I realized that indeed the fire was a stone's throw away from our home. I called Rachael to let her know and so she could join me in the pack-up.

It's not the first time we've done the runaround. Gathering irreplacable items. An heirloom Martin guitar. Photo albums from before the digital age. Art. All while doing our best to tend the impressionable nervous systems of our young children.

tags love, relationships

Is it okay to hurt the people you love?

Dr. Noah K. Goldstein, DACM L.Ac.

Yes. It’s okay to hurt the people you love.

“Wait, what?! Did they actually say that?”

Yes.

Given that part of being human is making mistakes and reacting poorly to emotionally charged situations when we’re under-resourced, hurting people is inevitable. Just as conflict is inevitable.

Often we hurt the people we care about most, our partners, parents, children, siblings, coworkers.

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Believe it or not, hurting people is not a problem. The problem is failing to repair.

Relationships with people we love and care about are usually resilient and strong. They can weather a lot. Amongst the things that keep relationships healthy, perhaps the most important is repair.

So, what does it mean to repair and how do we do it?

Repair is the term used to describe the process of reconnecting and fixing a bond that has been hurt.

First we have to acknowledge the other person’s pain and our role in their pain.

Then we have to make amends. Carefully discuss and explore what happened and why and how things need to happen differently in the future. We say carefully because, well, sometimes in the process of discussing and exploring things we can get reactivated.

Then we make a promise to do our best to change our ways.

Simple, yet not so simple work we all need to be doing.

So, while you can certainly try to avoid hurting people, what’s most important is what you do after it happens.

After you fight, and after you make up, it’s always nice to dance…

tags relationships, repair, safety, newsletter

Living in Joyful Relationship with the World

Dr. Noah K. Goldstein, DACM L.Ac.

We’re supporting the emergence of a bigger community of people who live with reverence and love and in beautiful and joyful relationships.

Relationships are fundamentally about connection and exchange. 

About give and take - offering and receiving. 

What’s most profound and fascinating to me is that attitude makes all the difference.

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tags relationships, boulder co, newsletter, inspiration, motivation