The Power of Discovering Intentions...

"I can't believe I did that again!"

"I'm not good at this"

"I don't deserve this this"

Whether it's through voices in our heads, emotions, or feelings in our bodies, we all experience "negativity." Self criticism, anxiety, depression, rage, anger, grumpiness, blah's are an inherent part of the human experience.

In fact, as I'm writing this, my internal cynic editor is annoyed by the triteness of that last sentence.

But we're going somewhere important, so I won't let myself get too caught up in that.

Behind all of the negativity is a positive intent.

To protect us from the discomfort of rejection.

To encourage us to reach a goal or outcome.

To let us know when we don't feel safe, or a when boundry has been crossed.

I have found again and again and again and again, that turning towards the anxiety or the self-critical voice in my head (rather than turning away) and asking, "What's the positive intent here?" consistently reaps benefits.

Instead of resisting the anxiety, I embrace it and try to understand how it's trying to serve me. Instead of ignoring or arguing with self critical voice in my head, I cut to the chase and elucidate why it's saying what's saying.

By connecting with the intention behind the voice or feeling, I can forgive the poor delivery mechanism and focus on orienting towards the needs and desires at hand.

What if I pause long enough to recognize that the buzzing feeling in my body is worried that I won't "get it all done"? Oh, what if I can say thank you for your care to that buzzing feeling. What if I let it know that it's actually distracting me and slowing me down? Oh, wow, from this calmer feeling right here, I can focus much more easily and I feel more confident that I'll get the most important things done.

I'm haunted by the way I used to berate myself even further after making an accidental mistake when I was a teenager by telling myself that the road to hell is paved with good intentions . It's true that good intentions don't excuse justify or undo our mistakes, but they are definitely a relevant part of the picture at hand.

What if I had been able to hold myself with compassion and love and still seek to repair whatever happened as a result of my mistake?

The main tricky thing here is that we have to slow down a bit. Usually, these voices and emotions are both and indication and a cause of us being in a hightened state. Usually, the last thing that I think I have time for is slowing down and checking in... but slow is smooth, and smooth is fast.

And if the shattered bottle of milk on our kitchen floor this mornig is an indication of anything, it's that moving too quickly, can cost twice the time.

Hope your day is full of finding the good intentions... and maybe, just maybe, the road that's paved with good intentions is a good road that will take us somewhere lovely...